感想

自从婚后，生活哟没有相像中幸福美满。我俩每隔三两就意见不合，心情糟透了。心里是清楚自己多么在乎他，但嘴巴就特别坏，说的话格外难听。说起来很可笑，我们是名义上最亲密的爱人，但如今似乎变成了最熟悉的陌生人。缘分来的难，但一不去珍惜它，它又静悄悄从你身边溜走……放下包袱，路才好走。放弃不一定是贬义，有时放弃是饶过双方的最佳方法，让大家都快乐。这次我放开他了，让他喘口气……如果那是他想要的，愿大家快乐！

Exact ONE YEAR!

I still remember how reluctant I am to leave my lovely home to this small town for my housemanship. I still remember the hardship I have to struggled through in my first posting. I still remembered how I have to travel to the nearest mart when I was still new in the town and without a car in the town.

The memories is still new in my mind. As it just happened yesterday.

I was depressed initially. and there is one important man who play an important role in accompanying me through my dysthymic period. He is a good listener and sometimes became my punchbag if necessary. yup That's my man! without him, I'm still having adjustment disorder probably developed into major depressive disorder.  Thanks to my love <3

Now I'm moving on to my forth posting - PAEDIATRIC!

It is a whole new thing to me. Pray hard I can do it well! Amen <3

It's been a while since i last visit and update my blog. Things happened during this period of time, good and bad.

I passed my orthopedic posting smoothly and now in surgical posting. It's fun working with my bosses in surgery now. They are very encouraging. I gained lotsa of resuscitation experience during this posting. I know there's alot more to come!

As the time passed, I learn that there is no place as similar as home. Family bonding is very important. Distance is no longer an issue if the bonding is strong! I'm still learning...

I still cant get used to live alone in taiping.

I sincerely wish that I did not choose taiping at the first place. I should have choose somewhere near to my home.

And I do miss my boy very much! We haven't been seeing each other for quite some times!!! oh dear!

Orthopedic HO in Taiping

First night call, I thought it would be an easy one.
I plan to have a good night sleep after finish assisting in emergency OT.
Things just happened out of your expectations.
I never have the chance to sit down and rest.
Three admission from 0000-0700
two polytrauma cases and one kid with deep laceration cut that need T&S

I was basically lie dead on my bed once I finished my night call
Never think of repeating the same things again in any time sooner.
Too bad I'm having a whole week of night calls...

gotta keep alot of nescafe with me already!

Week 3 as a functioning HO

Reporting from Hospital Taiping.
Week 3 of orthopedic HO life.
the workload is out of expectation.
Sometimes my mind just stop thinking, i'm just turning blank in the middle of the day.
I'm just too tired.
However I'm truly grateful to have helpful colleagues and bosses.
They are my friends and my tutors at the same times.
People will never learn until they got hit on the ground.
that's my perception and I'm totally agree with these.

and truly, being a graduate from university malaya hold a great burden. everyone put a high expectation on us. and well I personally think we are doing better than them.

I got a commonly asked questions from my colleagues. "how do u maintain your relationship with your boyfriend?"

He came once or twice in a while, accompanied me for lunch or dinner.
We are still madly in love :)

I'm awaiting for next meet up with my family and my love one =)

Pre-Working Blue

I'm officially a government servant after attending the Program Transformasi Minda( PTM).
I still can't believe that I have to work as a houseman for real this time. No more helping doctors and professors. I'm all alone.
I used to think that life of a houseman is a total shit.
We are the bottom most in the hierarchy, and we have to do all the stuff and yet being scolded even if were doing it perfectly right.
My worries is getting worse when I heard of circulating rumors that my hospital has a rather high extension rate. Stress level beyond your expectation now.
I kept comforting myself and CBT myself that everything will be alright. Yes it will be okay eventually.
I got to get packing now.
Departing to my destined working place in a few hours time.
Bye home bye holiday and bye everyone.

放空

人啊，不是机器，无法没有一丝情感的做一样事。
被逼到一种境界时，什么事都无法理智的去想， it's a state of paralysis of analysis.
有时候遇到这种情况，就得歇一会。

我现在就得放下一切，好好歇息。

不晓得我是心累了，还是思想堵住了？

我要躺在广阔的草原，仰望着夜空，哼着我最爱的曲子，慢慢的数星星。