Pre-Working Blue

I'm officially a government servant after attending the Program Transformasi Minda( PTM).
I still can't believe that I have to work as a houseman for real this time. No more helping doctors and professors. I'm all alone.
I used to think that life of a houseman is a total shit.
We are the bottom most in the hierarchy, and we have to do all the stuff and yet being scolded even if were doing it perfectly right.
My worries is getting worse when I heard of circulating rumors that my hospital has a rather high extension rate. Stress level beyond your expectation now.
I kept comforting myself and CBT myself that everything will be alright. Yes it will be okay eventually.
I got to get packing now.
Departing to my destined working place in a few hours time.
Bye home bye holiday and bye everyone.

放空

人啊，不是机器，无法没有一丝情感的做一样事。
被逼到一种境界时，什么事都无法理智的去想， it's a state of paralysis of analysis.
有时候遇到这种情况，就得歇一会。

我现在就得放下一切，好好歇息。

不晓得我是心累了，还是思想堵住了？

我要躺在广阔的草原，仰望着夜空，哼着我最爱的曲子，慢慢的数星星。

心事

转眼间，我的假期就到尾声了。
相信大家都忙着到处去游玩吧？我何尝不是呢？
不过，我倒是想陪一陪家人。
想到将要离乡背井到外出工作，眼泪就会不听使唤不停的在眼眶里打转。

假期里我遭遇了很多事物，有好有坏。当然也经历了一段情绪上的波折。我反思了很久，终于选择放下这些不愉快的遭遇，为何要伤心生气呢？ 有句名言 “生气是拿别人的过错来惩罚自己的蠢行”。我也相信征服了自己的悲观情绪便能征服世界上困难之事。

友情这回事，很难了解。

很多东西都很矛盾。

有些人就爱批评人，但是却在当事人面前可以当没一回事，人心难测。

好想念小时候，一切就是那么单纯。