Moment with Family

I've been so stressful lately. I'm glad that mom rang me up. Feel glad to talked to someone you trusted and loved. I'm so reluctant to stay in hostel now. Feel like fleeing away to somewhere with awesome scenery and great and sporty peoples! I had loss of appetite lately. I eat to give me energy throughout the day. I have no longer eating because of unsatisfied satiety center. I had early satiety and postprandial fullness. differential diagnosis? gastric carcinoma probably linitus plastica.

Mommy wants to go somewhere for vacation this weekend. She's been busy for other people and hardly have time for herself. Time for vacation. Malacca? No... I'm so sicked for traffic congestion in Malacca. enough of this crap in KL. Perhaps somewhere with beach? I didn't manage to go Teluk Cempedak for sea breeze with mcdonald sundae cone moment last weekend. Should have do it this weekend. 

I wanna go travel again. far far away from home. with my beloved one.

Mental and Physical Fatigue

I made myself a caffeine addict. As a consequence, I'm wide awake almost every single night. I staring blankly on my laptop screen. Deep inside my head, my hypothalamus and pituitary gland are dancing wildly. They are happily secreting endorphine. My mind ran wild. My heart racing fast. But my body were too weak to respond to the high endorphine level. I lied deadly on my bed, with long hours of blank stare and finally dozed off involuntarily. These cycles continue everyday. My happy little friends kept popping out on the surface of my face with creamy cheesy pus inside. And my hair kept falling off my scalp every single day. by the rate of hair loss like this, I bet I will be balded in no time. Sigh.

Fairy Tales stayed in my heart. I always believe in them. 

Anger Management

Do you know the ways to control your anger? Everyone gets angry on occasion. Overwhelming rage could damage one's physical and mental health. These are what I came across lately, a few ways to suppress or calm myself down:

1) Take a break as soon as you recognize that you are angry
-step away and don't ever talk to anyone as this could initiate unpleasant verbal insult.

2) Take a real deep breath

3) Go to "happy place"
-whatever place that could calm you down. focus on every objects in that place.

4) if the above doesn't really work, then try to think of some happy moments

5) talk to someone you trust

6)practice positive self-talking

7) try to see humour in what angered you

The above ways are just acute management of anger. I will share long term anger management in other day. GOOD NIGHT PEEPS! =)

Upside Down

I've been emotionally labile lately. I'm sorry for those who had been my victims. I knew I'm angry but my temper will be very very intense as compared to normal situation. I would not get angry for no reason. I should have sleep more lately. Maybe I  should consider early TAHBSO.

Miserable All Time

"Medical students are not even a bacteria as compared to houseman."

I came across these statement during my surgical posting. I'm not as ego as any surgeon do, however i'm not as ignorant as other people do. Sometimes, i found the way the healthcare workers talked to us was kind of harsh. Oh well, give me a break, didn't they learn communication skill since young? there are plenty of ways to talk to someone in a proper way. I'm sure everyone will willing to obey commands if the talking part was okay.

Well, let's talk about something else. How am I now after decades of time leaving my blogs aside? I'm been through the busiest and toughest postings ever which was paediatric and found that it was not that scary as the rumours said. However there are so much for me to learn yet. Im grateful to have Prof Wan and Dr NurShadia as my mentors.They taught me really alot. Poor brain the storage size is too small for all these great knowledges. PLEASE STAY WITH ME MEMORIES! Then goes the surgery. I can say I learnt and practice most of the procedures here. Practices made perfect. Now i don't feel fear while setting intravenous line; I learnt the way to comfort patient before setting in branula. seriously I had saw so many kinds of patients with varying reactions. They were just so adorable. Once in Primary Care Medicine, nurses told me, setting lines in elderly was very difficult. I do agreed, but we still have to learn as we will have to do ourselves later in life. The most difficult part in T&S was injecting topical analgesia. CBD is kinda toturing in elder women. ABG is really not easy too. peeps, practices made perfect. We can go through these.

I'm looking forward for EOP which were just around the corner. Paeds EOP and Surgery EOP. God Blessed Me please.

Crazy Trip

My bestie Chu Yee came and talked to me on a Monday night. She invited me to go Singapore. This was when a fantastical journey began. It was a journey to see our future, to feel the differences and to relax my mind.

We kicked off our journey with a long strode to the busiest part of Singapore. Busy as not in the term of working life, but in the meaning of busy nightlife. Clarke Quay. 

This is the river at Clarke Quay with nicely decorated boat and I am standing in front of the Clarke Quay center.  I enjoyed the night breeze there. cool and calming. I can say it is a night place for the couples to hang around too. From there, we strode off to Marina Bay. 

A picture of us before leaving Clarke Quay

what's next? we reached Marina Bay to have a look of Merlion!!! I was so excited as this is a place where my favorite korean actress have her shoot here in a movie called "Dangerous Love". I'm standing at a place where she stood before, breathing in the air she exhaled before. yeah!

Chu Yee and me in front of Merlion! 

sui cheng and me
she is a happy-go-lucky girl  ^^

"we meet for a reason, either you are a blessing or a lesson"

sitting by the beachside, enjoying the sea breeze. I dont want to think about anything, just relax =D

all the way back to Outrum Park > BLK146 jalan Bukit Merah
We are tired but happy!

That night I have a really long pillow talk with Chu Yee. Girls' talk :)

p/s: Sui Cheng had a great night with a good looking hostel boss' son. phewit!

DAY 2

Everyone warned us to wake up early for Universal sTudio. Guess what time I woke up? 7.30am. Our plan was wake up at 6.00 am and depart at 7.30am. Great! We slept around 3 something at the night before. Served us right! LOL. 

FOund this in Transformer's theme park. My Birthday =p

nice hat!

I wish for a true love. Let it be in blood =)

Charlie Chaplin

waiting for transformer 3D roller coaster! AWESOME!

GReaT experience in Universal Studio!!! ^^

At night, we went out at 8 pm, hoped on the wrong bus but luckily the bus driver is a Malaysian with Singapore PR. He drove us to the nearest bus stop at chinatown.  We met with Chu yee's MRSM best friend, cui ting. She is cute! We had a great dinner at the hawker stall ^^

the food is rather cheap here if we are earning singapore dollar.

The night continued with girl's talk . Haha we were having fun gossiping about someone! =)

DAY 3

After checking out from the hostel at 10 am, we heading straight to Jalan Bugis! Awesome!!! For a shopping maniac like me, this place is a haven! 

a picture of sui cheng eating her breakfast. she still looked cocky as usual =p

P/s Food is really nice here in singapore. I have gained 2 kg!!! arghhh!!!

We met with Sui Cheng's brother at Jurong East station and headed straight to Kranji to take express bus to Custom Singapore. Thanks to Sui Cheng's brother!!! We have great time in Skudai too! I might come back again one day. =)

有时有时

最近都很累。
最近得了一场大病后，整个人变得像哭包。一点小事都足以让我哭上一整天。
有时候，我有一股冲动，　想要放声大哭，　不想理会旁人的眼光。
有时候，我什么都不想想，　只是要随心所欲做我爱做的事情。
人老了，　开始有自己“沉默”的时候。　就是耳朵自然关闭，嘴巴封锁，什么都不要听，什么都不想讲。有时候是心情低落；但有时只是纯谇自我关闭。
希望大家不要介意我“失常”的时刻。